Broadway Song Parodies
by Slytherclaw-girl17
Summary: Originally "Castle Up On Mars," this is now one entire collection of my song parodies for Harry Potter/Broadway. Please note: Now or Never SvG will remain one document.
1. Castle Up On Mars

_**Disclaimer: **__I do not own Harry Potter, Les Miserables, or A Very Potter Musical. I wish I did._

DRACO:

There is a castle up on Mars

I will be transferred there one day.

No one will tell me "go away"

Not in my castle up on Mars.

I use a rocketship to fly

And a space suit that I must wear.

Because up on Mars there is no air.

Not in my castle up on Mars.

Headmaster Lion walking by

I ride on him and hum a lullaby

He's nice to see and he's soft to touch

Oh Rumbleroar, I love you very much.

Er…

I know a place with many halls

And there are many candy bars

Granger loves me once and for all

There in my castle up on Mars.

_Review and Comment please! And check out my other songs and stories!_


	2. Magically Blonde

Hola Amigos! It's Slytherclaw-girl17 here, just giving you a little intro to this next song. Sorry it's been so long, but I've been busy with school, plus I started a blog. I also have been busy on Youtube. I don't have a camera, but the name's Gamershe17 if you want to check it out.

Okay, so in this "story," (I'm typing a summary because I don't want to put in a script and dialogue), Luna Lovegood, the genius she is, has just saved Draco from going to Azkaban (because Malfoy was Malfoy, don't ask more). After that, Snape came in and congratulated her for saving one of his students, and then kissed her. He didn't expel her, but he started failing her, and now she's decided to quit. In this parody, "Elle" is Luna, "Emmett" is Neville (because they're a really cute couple), and "Callahan" is Snape. Oh, and if you didn't get it already, "Brooke" is Draco. If you haven't heard the song, check it out. Enjoy!

(PS. Lowercase names mean spoken, UPPERCASE means sung)

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LUNA:

Take back the books and pack up the clothes

Clear off my bed and drop off the key.

Leave with what's left of my dignity

Get on the train, and just go.

Chalk it all up to experience

They said I'd pass, and I *sigh* agreed.

Who could say then where my path would lead?

Well now I know…

Back to the sun,

Back to the gnomes

Back to my "wonderful" home.

Back where I'm known,

And search in my own

Very small pond

Laugh with my dad when I arrive

We'll read the Quibbler and live

That's fine with me

Just let me be

Magically Blonde

(Luna then approaches Neville, who is waiting outside the dungeon corridor)

Neville:

There she is, Witch of the Year

LUNA:

Thanks for your help and for all you've done

Thank you for treating me decently

Neville: What's wrong?

LUNA:

Maybe someday you can visit me

Send me an owl, say hello

NEVILLE:

Wait, where are you going?

LUNA

Sorry for "creeping out" everyone

NEVILLE

What brought on this?

LUNA

You did your best with a hopeless case

NEVILLE

That's Ludicrous

BOTH

You are the best thing about this place

NEVILLE

And you should know…

Luna:

Severus hit on me.

Neville:

What?

Luna:

He kissed me, he failed me, he taunted me, there's no reason for me to stay.

NEVILLE

What about love?

I never mentioned love

The timing's bad, I know.

But perhaps, if I made it more clear

That you belong right here,

You wouldn't have to go

'Cause you'd know that I'm so much in love-

LUNA

Back to the sun,

Back to my gnomes,

Back to my magical home,

NEVILLE

Please Luna, open the door

LUNA

Lie on my bed

Dreams in my head

Don't stray beyond

NEVILLE

We both know you're worth so much more

LUNA

Some girls fight hard

Some join the team

And some girls were just meant to dream-

NEVILLE

If you can hear, can I just say

How much I want you to stay

LUNA

It's not up to me,

Just let me be

Magically Blonde

NEVILLE

Luna, I need you to stay

LUNA

It's not up to me

Just let me be

Magically Blonde.

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Thanks for reading! Sorry, I can't really think of a good ending… If you want, you can leave a comment/review saying how you think it should end!

Auf wiedersehen!


	3. Seasons of Magic

Hello peoples! It's SG17 here (yeah, I don't always like typing out my username)! Sorry I haven't been doing… anything on this site, but it gets a bit annoying with schoolwork and stuff. But I've decided to actually do things! I'll do more song parodies, of course, but then I also want to get started on my Glee fanfics now that it's back on television.

Also: Quick shout-out to two peoples: anti-pookie and PookietoyourMaureen. I say two, because they tend to work together on their projects and they do have awesome song parodies that relate to Harry Potter.

This song is a parody of the song "Seasons of Love" from the show RENT. That's all I'm giving you.

* * *

ALL:

525,600 minutes

525 thousand moments, oh dear

525,600 minutes

How do you measure a magical year?

HARRY:

In potions

RON:

In dragons

HERMIONE:

In classes

NEVILLE:

Bottles of butterbeer

GINNY:

In owls

LUNA:

In smiles, in laughter, in strife

ALL:

In 525,600 minutes, how do you measure a year in our lives?

How about ma-gic (x3)

Measure in

Seasons of Ma-gic (x2)

FRED & GEORGE (in unison):

525,600 minutes

525 thousand games of quidditch

525,600 minutes

How do you measure the life of a wizard or a witch?

HARRY:

In bad guys he fought

Or in times that she cried

CHO:

In snitches he caught

Or the way that he died?

ALL:

It's time now

To sing out

Though the story never ends

Let's celebrate, remember a year in this group of friends

Remember the ma-gic

GINNY:

(Oh, you'ye got to, you've got to remember our spells)

OTHERS:

Remember the ma-gic

G: (You know that magic's a gift no one can sell)

Remember the ma-gic

G: (Share spells, give spells, spread spells)

Measure in Ma-gic

G: (measure, measure your life in ma-gic)

ALL:

Seasons of Ma-gic

Seasons of Ma-gic

GINNY:

Measure your life, measure your life in magic


	4. Sit Down Rocking the Boat

Sit Down, You're Rocking The Boat 

Ron: Wow, How'd you fall in the Great Lake?

Dennis Creevey: Well, it happened to me quite suddenly… Like a dream!

(Sung)

It's like I dreamed I was on the boat to Hogwarts

And by some chance I had brought my friend along

And there I stood

And I hollered "Over here, mate!"

But the Slytherins, they did something wrong…

For the students all said 'Sit down.

Sit down, you're rocking the boat.'

The students all said sit down, sit down you're rocking the boat.

And the Big Squid will drag you under

By the firm collar of your midnight cloak

Sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down

Sit down, you're rocking the boat.

We sailed away on that little boat to Hogwarts

And by some chance I found myself with Slytherins

And there they stood, teaching me some nasty vocab

But they knew that I was bound to resist…

For the students all said 'Sit down.

Sit down, you're rocking the boat.'

The students all said sit down, sit down you're rocking the boat.

And the Big Squid will drag you under

By the firm collar 'round your wicked throat

Sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down

Sit down, you're rocking the boat.

And as I laughed with those passengers to Hogwarts,

A great big guy came and pushed me overboard!

And as I sank, I hollered "Someone save me!"

That's the minute I woke up, thank the gourd!

And I said to myself 'Sit down.

Sit down, you're rocking the boat.'

I said to myself sit down, sit down you're rocking the boat.

And the Big Squid will drag you under

By the firm collar of your midnight cloak

Sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down

Sit down, you're rocking the boat!

Hermione: Wait, did you thank the GOURD?

Dennis: Oh, yeah. Look! (Pulls out a gourd with a smiley face drawn on it. Hermione leaves.)

Dennis: Where's she going?

Harry: To the great lake. She's trying to drown herself.

Dennis: Good luck. The Squid doesn't like Mudblood meat much.

(Everyone stares at him)

Ron: (To Colin) How was he sorted into Gryffindor?

**Thanks so much! I'll be starting a new Song-parody thingy soon, now without Broadway! And read some of my other fics, too! **


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